The Falkon

Jake and I learned a valuable lesson on community Wednesday night.

We were driving back from Massachusettes in a 2000 Dodge Ram Truck that my brother had bequethed to us for the boys to have as they learn to drive. While driving through the mountains of Pennsylvania around 70 miles an hour on a 90 degree day, having had the fans on high all day after having driven for 11 hours the radiator said, "enough!"

We pulled over, raised the hood, and quickly remembered I know nothing about cars other than how to put gas in it. The fact that I knew how to raise the hood was a miracle in and of itself. We didn't know if this was a simple over heating or another major issue. It took me about ten seconds to realize this was a job for Tim. Tim is a friend of mine that I've known for years who is a professional machanic. In 2 seconds flat Tim was able to diagnose the problem and tell me how to fix it - on the phone! We let the truck rest a bit to cool down, dumped a bunch of water in the radiator and drove home without incident (we were through with the mountains thankfully). I'm not sure what we would have done without Tim. Probably would have spent a ton of money for some Pennsylvanian stranger to tell me it was only overheated. Thank you Tim.

And thank God for the idea of living life in community. Since the Garden of Eden it has been God's plan for people to live in relationship and community with people. David had Jonathon. Abraham had Lot. Tom had Jerry. Paul had Barnabus. Jesus had the 12. David had his mighty men. To be sure we were meant to live as a part of a larger team. Tim's calming, knowledgable voice was a God-send. His assurance was peace-giving. His insights were invaluable and saved us some hassle and expense. Community and freindship is a great idea.

Peace and Joy
Rob

PS we named the truck The Falkon after the Millenium Falcon (Star Wars).

Role # 1

This weekend at The River's Mancation we spent some time looking at 4 different roles given to men.

That first night I was sharing how I am still suprised how much my 3 boys long for and want physical affection from me. Even our oldest who is 12 and now a lanky 6 feet tall loves when it is his turn to sit "on my lap" (a near impossibility with his size) while watching TV. As I thought about that reality I realized that even I still have a longing for physical affection and affirmation from my dad - although the desire to sit on his lap is long past :). As men, we all have a built in need for such affirmation. Unfortunatley for a variety of reasons this need has gone unmet for many.

Thank God for God. Whether our dads have been able to meet our need for affection and affirmation or not, God longs to be Abba for us, to us, and with us. Granted he can't touch us physically, but he can bring words of affirmation (if we listen) and overt signs of love (if our eyes are open).

That first role that we were encouraged to walk into at the Mancation was the Role of Son. Son of the Most High God. Son of the King of Kings. Son of the Creator of the Universe. Son of the Father of Compassion. Son of the one who has reconciled us to Himself. Son of Abba. Son. It is yours to embrace my brothers. "See what manner of love he's given unto us that we should be called sons of God."

To embrace this role we were given a couple assignments. 1. Get alone with Abba. The "how" doesn't matter. Whether it is in your basement, a tree stand, or while riding a motorcycle doesn't matter. Just make some time to get in the word, ask of the Lord, and listen. 2. Be young again as if you were a young son to Abba (which you are). Play, goof round, don't take yourself to seriously and feel free to forget about work for a bit.

Peace and Joy
Rob

St. Julian

It's been said that life sucks and then you die. It's also been said that the only sure things in life are death and taxes. Hmmm... At times this certainly feels true. Heaviness, depression, sorrow, loss, cancer, illness, loneliness. Things that make the two statements ring true. Yet what seems true isn't always true.

Jesus says in John 8 that, "the truth will set you free." The truth is that all things will work together for good for those who love God and are called according to his purpose (Rom 8). The truth is that nothing can seperate us from the love of Christ (also Rom. 8). The truth is that there is a peace that passes understanding (Phil. 4).

This is good news. It's good news because I know many of you struggle with the weightiness of life. It's good news because in "this life you will have troubles." It's good news because, at times, our issues seem to get the best of us. It's good news becasue it sure does seem like life sucks and then you die. (Now, some of you are blessed with a cheery disposition and are mercifully clueless to these heavy, dark, morose thoughts - to you I saw count yourself blessed.)

As Julian of Norwich has said, "All will be well. All will be well and in all manner of things, all will be well."

Be of good cheer men for all will be well. That's a promise. A Biblical promise.

Peace and Joy
Rob

Mancation

This might come as a suprise to some of you - men are different than women. Shocking, I know. But true none the less.

I'm gearing up for this weekends "Mancation" (i.e. The River's Men's retreat) and looking forward to some extended guy time. I believe it is intentional use of the masculine in Pr. 27:17, "As iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another." It does not say as one man sharpens a women, nor does it say as one woman sharpens a man. It says, "so one man sharpens another." To be sure as men we can be refined by women. Shoot I get a bunch of rough edges shaved off of me regularly by Kristy, and that is a good thing. I'm a huge fan of Joyce Meyer - listen to a few sermons a week by her and am almost always challenged to grow.

Yet there is something uniquely sweet when men walk the faith walk together. There is something specifically male in each of us that can best be related to by other males. Only another man who has fought "the addiction" (of course I'm talking porn) can understand the shame and remorse. Only another man can know the struggle (or lack thereof) of trying to lead the family well in the ways of the Lord while the world pulls us to do anything but that. Only another man can relate to the deep longing for unfelt affection from a father and the embarassment of having that longing.

Truly men need men. More specifically you need men.

Peace and Joy
Rob

Built some shelves last night. I usually hate such projects. It took much longer than planned. It wasn't done until midnite. My plans for the evening were shot. And it was awesome.

Jake (our 12 year old son) and I had one of those cool father son moments that I doubt either of us will forget. Together we built a fairly elaborate shelving system out of an old book shelf we had sitting around the house. As I said it was a great time. The key phrase in the process - "together." I had a blast teaching him how to use a skill saw. He had a blast using the skill saw. I felt a little like a carpentry Yoda and he was my padawan. Awesome. Just awesome. There was something indescribable that we both were aware of that was richly present. We did it together. Had I done it alone I would have hated it. Had he done it alone it would have been miserable. But together it was a great night.

What blows me away and I can barely comprehend is that Abba feels a million more times that way about time with us. He destined us for adoption to be his children says Paul in Ephesians. John would say in 1 John, see what manner of love he has given unto us that we should be called children of God. He is dad and we are sons. Dearly loved sons whose company the father delights in. Wow. Now that's a cool thought.

Peace and Joy
Rob

It is a sure thing - Tommy must go. (If you are confused about Tommy, go back and read my first blog entry). Discipline is very helpful in such an endeavor. Yet discipline is not the point. The point of all this Tommy-Talk is freedom. Paul would say in 2 Cor. "where the Spirit of the Lord is there is freedom." He would say in Galatians, "It is for freedom that He set us free." Discipline is a tool that serves us on the journey toward freedom.

Yet if we are not vigilant, discipline can become a cruel task master bringing pharisaical rigidity, guilt, shame and shackles. So to avoid such nonsense I ate an ice cream cone from Dairy Queen yesterday and loved it. Discipline out of balance would have screamed at me. But discipline in it's place said, "enjoy."

To be sure much of what I blog about is the pursuit of discipline for the sake of freedom. Yet I want to be sure that it is in it's place as a servant to the freedom Christ has for us.

Peace and Joy
Rob

He ddn't flee. His son died. A sobering correlation don't you think?

Of course I'm talking about good old King David. He saw Bathsheba, kept looking, and well... you know the rest of the story (2 Sam 11 & 12). One man's sin led to the literal death of two (Uriah and the baby born to Bathsheba) and the emotional death of countless others. All because he didn't flee. Sins effect is never localized to just the sinner. It has far reaching and deadly effect. In a word sin is; deadly.

In this life we will have troubles and temptations. The trick is to flee from them like a snowman at a tanning convention. Run man run. This is so much easier said than done. Yet Thank God Jesus didn't die on the cross for us to only do easy things. Thank God we were not meant to walk alone. (I love the fact that I can share my "Bathsheba" moments with some brothers. Their insight, prayers, and kicks in the pants help me to run.) Thank God for David's sobering story. And thank God for David's redemtion.

My brother - you will face temptation. Today. Tomorrow. And the next day. Flee. Run. Scram. Bolt. Sprint. Dash. So others might live.

Peace and Joy
Rob

In my time with God this morning I read an account of Fr. Edward Farrell who went on a vacation to Ireland to celebrate his uncles 80th birthday. (I read the account in Abba's Child by Brennan Manning.) One morning they got up very early and took a walk to Lake Killarney and paused to watch the sunrise. "Suddenly the uncle turned and went skipping down the road. He was radiant, beaming, smiling from ear to ear. His nephew said, 'Uncle Seamus, you really look happy.'
'I am lad.'
'Want to tell me why?'
His eighty-year-old uncle replied, 'Yes, you see, my Abba is very found of me.'"

Wow. The author went on to ask, "how would you respond if I asked you this question, 'Do you honestly believe God likes you, not just loves you because theologicaly God has to love you?'"

This is a hard one to grasp in fulness. God really like me? God really likes you? How much of life is spent trying to make ourselves better and/or atone for our sin? How many hours do we spend wishing we were more this or less that? How much energy is exerted for the sake of self improvement? To be sure growth and maturity is a good thing (as I've said Tommy must go - see initial blog :)). Yet how much of our efforts or lack of them in some instances are directly a result of self loathing or at least self dislike?

What would it be like to live like uncle Seamus truly believing deep down at the core of our being that God really likes us - a lot. It seems that therein lies the way to freedom.

"Can a woman forget her nursing child, and have no compassion on the sone of her womb? Even these may forget, But I will not forget you" (Is. 49:15). God loves us, likes us and has a boat load of compassion and tenderness for us. He is very fond of us.

He likes us. Alot

Peace and Joy
Rob

When is good enough good enough? There are many times I find myself flagelating (not to be confused with flatulating) myself over my short comings. In fact as I review the times I get funky, morose and even depressed more often than not the funk comes when I get overly down on myself. If I could only see myself as Jesus sees me. He doesn't love me in spite of my sin. He loves me even with my sin. Jesus looks at me through his eyes of grace adn not through my eyes of guilt and shame. Thank God for that.

Now, if I could only see myself through those same eyes of grace. In Christ I am a new creaton, the old is gone (says Paul). I am a saint (says Paul). I am chosen and dearly loved (says Jesus and Paul). Yet I often look in the mirror and see a big f*%k up (excuse my french). Self acceptance is hard to come by. Peace with self is rare. Loving myself as Christ does - nary impossible. It's no wonder I have a tough time loving others. At times I can barely love myself.

My prayer this morning is that I would have God Goggles on when I see myself. (You remember Beer Goggles? Back in college my frineds who drank would say at the bar after several drinks people begin to look prettier. Very similar to God Goggles minus the hang over. Looking through the eyes of Christ we see people as much more beautiful - including our selves.) I pray you do too.

Peace and Joy
Rob

Yesterday was Kristy's birthday. She had a great day. Breakfast with a good frined, the afternoon shopping, dinner with her parnets (and me and the kids), then the Karate Kid to cap the day off. The kids, her folks, and I all wanted to make this a great day for her so we gave her carte blanch power to do whatever she wanted. She had a great day.

I on the other hand had a long and tiring day. Most of me was pumped to give her the freedom to do whatever. Yet there was a part of me that I am embarassed by and a little shocked still exists. Part of me didn't want to serve Kristy. Part of me rebelled on the inside. Part of me wants me to always be at the receipient of someone elses services. Part of me was tired of serving someone else.

The apostle Paul in Romans 12:1 talks about offering our bodies as living sacrifices. His languages points to an ongoing action and not a one time thing. He would say in his letter to the Phillipians to consider others as better than yourself. And in Ephesians he encourages husbands to love wives like Christ loved the church - by dying to self. Yikes. That little part in me was upset I had to yet again offer myself as a sacrifice. It was perterbed I had to consider another better than my self. And it certainly wanted nothing to do with loving Kristy like Christ loved the church.

And Yet by God's grace that little part stayed the minority part locked away on the inside. Because this was so, Kristy had a great day. Hmmm... When I followed Christ's way instead of my preferred way another person was blessed and in turn my day ended wonderfully. A good lesson about life learned on my wifes birthday - don't you think,

Peace and Joy
Rob